There is a story which I would much rather tell than record it as I am doing here.

A government official had to interview a few people in one of the outports. When he arrived there he went to one of the homes to make some inquiries in order to locate the people he wished to talk with. His first question was:

Interviewer: "Is there a William Porter here?"

Resident: "No zir. No William Porter 'ere zir, no William Porter."

Interviewer: "What, no Bill Porter here?"

Resident: "Oh yes, dere's a Bill Porter 'ere."

Interviewer: "How about John Kean?"

Resident: "No zir. No John Kean 'ere zir. No John Kean."

Interviewer: "What about Jack Kean?"

Resident: "Jack Kean? Jack Kean? Oh yes.. sure dat's me."

A friend of mine who is a widow told me that her husband had said to her on one occasion, "it is better to be lonely than miserable." Talking to a bachelor in the post office one day I related this to him. His reply was, "Do you know what I say - tis better to be miserable alone."

The following is supposed to be an authentic story from the Northern Peninsula.

A tourist drove up to the gas station and requested $5.00 worth of gas. When the gas started to flow onto the ground the tourist called out, "Hey! The gas is running onto the ground."

Young tank attendant: "Yes, but 'tis not $5.00 worth yet."

Taken from Al Clouston's "When I Grow Too Old to Laugh..shoot me!"