Social Skills

Social skills are closely related to, and in fact somewhat dependent on, communication skills. Looking again at Eddie, he speaks differently to his fellow inmates than he does to corrections officers, than he does to Louise NewTeacher. The relationships Eddie has with these different people require him to adapt his style of communicating.

Eddie recognizes that within the facility there are specific social responses appropriate for various circumstances. This is an extremely important lesson to learn because, upon release from incarceration, Eddie (as representative of all incarcerated youth) must interact with an even larger variety of people. Outside of the facility, Eddie will still interact with authorities and peers. However, the list of people with whom he will be in daily or regular contact will expand to also include family members, employers, coworkers, probation officers, neighbors, etc. Incarcerated youth must know when and how to use a repertoire of socially acceptable behaviors for many different environments, such as:

• in the classroom,
• in the facility of incarceration,
• in the neighborhood or on the “street,”
• within the home or in a family situation, and
• on the job.

Incarcerated youth must be able to juggle the multiple roles they play, both in– and outside of the facility. For example, within the facility, inmates must get along with corrections officers, but not at the risk of alienating fellow inmates, and vice–versa. Upon release, former inmates will have to juggle more roles, which now may be even less clearly defined than when they were in a controlled setting. Educators might consider “peer management” as a possible topic of instruction, in which issues such as avoiding peer pressure can be addressed. This serves students dually since the lessons learned about peer management within the facility can be applied to the “outside” world, where peer pressure may be an even stronger influence. Peer management is particularly important to former inmates who may be pressured to rejoin a gang upon return to the old neighborhood.

Handling peer pressure is problematic for many young people, incarcerated youth not withstanding. This social skill, along with many other social skills, can be addressed by encouraging students to empathize with and respect the people with whom they come into contact. Identifying and understanding another’s situation, feelings, and motives may shed light as to why that person is behaving in a certain fashion. Think back to how Eddie put himself in the corrections officers’ shoes:

In maintaining security, the corrections officers considered Eddie a troublemaker. Once Eddie understood and respected this situation, he was able to adapt new social skills to alleviate the tension between himself and the corrections officers.

In terms of peer pressure, agreeing to do what peers suggest, although contrary to one’s own feelings, might easily be misconstrued as an indicator of empathy and respect for peers. This thought process fails to consider respecting oneself. Self–respect, as indicated earlier, is the key to opening many doors to opportunity. Thus, in acquiring social skills, students must learn to identify, understand, and respect their own situation, feelings, and motives as well as those of the people with whom they interact.